UNDERSTANDING THE CONCEPT OF MODERATION AND MODESTY
Moderation and modesty are two words that are often used interchangeably. While both connotes a “mode” or a manner of expression and behaviour, they still aren’t the same. They both entail being consciously considerate and not overtly superfluous and extravagant in every manner of behaviour, which means not doing things in excess and extreme. Moderation and modesty cut across all areas of life from the likes of speaking, relating with people, food and drink consumption, mode of dressing and the others.
Both moderation and modesty have their own distinct meaning, though there is a lot of similarities but, their differences and dissimilarities still makes both of them be used differently in referring to a subject that suits its use.
MODERATION
Moderation can be viewed or expressed in varied perspectives but all point to a unified meaning. For me, moderation is simply having an ideal model in your operations. This is to say, it is having a “not too extreme” mindset in your behaviour with respect to anything. Moderation is a really calm and temperate way of responding to life’s excesses. It’s actually a virtuous attitude that paves way for other good qualities such as contentment, self-discipline, self-restraint, self-worth and the likes.
Every area of our lives needs some level of moderation in it. Moderation is oftentimes tied to an attitude of “not drinking” or “not eating” too much, especially the “not drinking” aspect. But in the real sense, moderation has no restriction to its application. If you really stand to notice the problems in your life, you will see that some level of moderation is lacking, though you might not even see the problem as a problem but, it is surely a problem because you’re not really measured the level of excesses you apply to it.
Doing things to a point when it becomes too extreme and excessively awful, is such a waste, it is not really worthwhile. The thing you need to understand is that there is charm and beauty in moderation. Your level of moderation tends to play a pivotal role in your lifestyle, relationship, career and others.
CONVERSATIONAL MODERATION
There is this type of moderation that I call, conversational moderation. It is the level of moderation you apply when conversing and communicating with people.it is otherwise known as “speech moderation”. Talking less and listening more is what this moderation entails. If you’re the type that talks too much, you always blab and blat about every single little detail happening in your life or the life of others, you don’t seem to care if the person you’re talking with has something to say because you’re not willing to listen, you just want to talk, be heard and listened to at all times, then you would really be harming and hampering yourself because, there is no moderation in your conversation, and that will yield no good result.
Now, you being moderate doesn’t mean you’ll miss out on all the fun things of life, in fact, you tend to enjoy the fun things of life when you do things in moderation. You being moderate just mean that you find value in the little things of life and not necessarily its excesses. Doing things in moderation creates a kind of value for it, and that makes you not suffer from any kind of abuse. You don’t have to eat too much of that meal before you realize it is tasty, or you don’t necessarily have to overdose before you know you’re good looking.
You really need to learn to do things in it’s minimal. More joy and happiness is derived when you know how to control the way you do things, doing excess of it just makes it look less of worth and useless because it has suffered from abuse.
MODESTY
Now talking about modesty. Modesty can be seen as a form of moderation coupled with humility and meekness. Etymologically, modesty originates from the Latin word “Modestus” meaning “Keeping within measures”.
Though modesty can be used in every other area of life, its usage has been mostly inclined to dress mode. So whenever the word is used, it is often in respect to how a person dresses and his clothing lifestyle. But since modesty also means humility, so it can be used in relation to our attitudes and characters.
Now looking at modesty from the angle of humility and meekness. This just simply means not being too proud or confident in yourself or your abilities. You may know and be able to do so much, but still, choose to live a lowly life. You don’t boast or brag about your abilities and skills, and you know how to maintain that humble lifestyle because it has become second nature to you.
Humility is one of the many virtues that is lacking in our world today. So many people want to be exalted above others, they want to be treated like kings, they want to live flamboyantly and show it off, but then, they don’t want to treat others the way they want to be treated. As the Golden rule states, “Do unto others, as you would like them to do unto you”. It’s funny how people tend to be humble and meek when they have nothing, but the moment they seem to have something in their possession, they become pompous and arrogant all of a sudden. They now feel superior to everyone else, they do things without thinking of how it will hurt others around them. This kind of abrupt change in attitude always keeps me thinking, “where has all the humility gone to…” It may be surprising to you when I say people don’t change, various situations they pass through just makes them amplify whatever attribute they have had all this while. So that humility trait they portray is an act they put up when they had nothing—more like a fake living. They feel, “If you’ve nothing, say nothing”. Eventually, when they acquire a little bit of luxury, the scene is cut. The act of humility is dropped and their true innate character begins to unveil.
That shouldn’t be you. Don’t think that humility is for the destitute and desolate. In fact, you tend to be more respected and admired when you’re humble in your time of abundance. Don’t say because you’re older, richer, smarter or even finer than the other person, you won’t relate with him or show good gestures to the person. If you’re good, you’re good, it doesn’t matter the people you are being good to, what matters is that as long as the goodness is always in you, you’ll always be humble and willingly do for others.
MODESTY IN DRESSING
Now modesty in respect to dressing and clothing is the most discussed, and obviously, it focuses more on the females’ manner of dressing. Females who tend to dress up without revealing sensitive parts of their bodies are known to be modest. While those who do otherwise are tagged immodest and these immodest females are usually scorned and scoffed at by society.
The issue of being modest varies from individual, cultures, country, religions, professions and even lifestyles. A person’s definition of modesty might be immodest to another, but in a general sense, there is a level of immodesty that seems too extreme that a large number of people don’t agree with. Females are always advised to dress decently because the nature of their being, tend to evoke seduction easily. But then some females don’t actually care if their dressing is immodest, as long as they are comfortable with it, they are totally fine with that. However, wisdom needs to be applied in this area because, as the saying goes, “You will be addressed the way you are dressed”. So, whatever way you want to be addressed publicly, dress as though.
Apart from indecent dressing, modesty is also with the excesses limitation you place in your dressing. In other words, dressing extravagantly is immodest. The fact that modesty in dressing is mostly attributed to the female folks, doesn’t mean the males are allowed to go unclad. Males need to be modest too in their way of dressing. Now the world may feel that this seduction issue is only elicited by the females, but they are wrong. The problem of seductive elicitation is of both genders. Some males immodest dressing tend to cause sexual arousal too, though females don’t often show it, it is there. Males also need to learn modesty in their dressing manners so as not to cause unnecessary arousal of sexual feelings and emotions.
CONCLUSION
Infusing both moderation and modesty in your daily lives is not only important but necessary. Believe me when I say, “you’ll save yourself a lot of trouble and stress by living a moderate and modest life”. You need to learn to become more aware and conscious of whatever you do so that you can detect when things are going out of moderation and modesty.
Moderation and modesty are 2keys attributes for living a lowly and humble life. Deliberate efforts should be made in applying them in all aspects of your daily living. Like I said earlier, “You tend to derive more enjoyment and enthusiasm when you’re moderate and modest in your living”.
To sum up: never overlook the benefits you stand to gain from being moderate and modest, their benefits are beyond what you can ever imagine. If at this point you still haven’t applied them in your life, you can start from this moment on. Begin from the little stuff you do, from eating and to your spending habits. Soon you’ll start to derive a sense of peace and a controlled living.
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